So Now What?
So Now What?
(for Charles Bukowski)
During war,
milk is the colour of blood, honey
the colour of bone
The skulls here are bored
They want a new life, not this tragedy
I’m listing all your war crimes
I remember being happy
But I don’t want to remember
I don’t want to remember the man
I remember bombs and Gaza instead
Amputated limbs like branches
Here, everything tastes like seawater
I hope I’ll wake up from this dream soon
And that the man will return to me
in the morning and to numb the pain
I take the pills one by one
and a fog descends upon me
I wish you had decided to stay
so that we could make things work
but you never did and the truth is
I must accept that as fact and choose to live
For some time I breathed easier
in this world because of you
Because you had become all my reasons
I have questions and they trouble me
Do I still live inside your heart and
inside your life as a passing thought?
I write a letter to God and put it inside a poem.
At night I pray for Israel too, because in war nobody wins.
I pray for soldiers on both sides.
That their blood will turn into flowers.
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