So Now What?

So Now What? by Abigail George
So Now What?
(for Charles Bukowski)
During war, milk is the colour of blood, honey the colour of bone The skulls here are bored They want a new life, not this tragedy I’m listing all your war crimes I remember being happy But I don’t want to remember I don’t want to remember the man I remember bombs and Gaza instead Amputated limbs like branches Here, everything tastes like seawater I hope I’ll wake up from this dream soon And that the man will return to me in the morning and to numb the pain I take the pills one by one and a fog descends upon me I wish you had decided to stay so that we could make things work but you never did and the truth is I must accept that as fact and choose to live For some time I breathed easier in this world because of you Because you had become all my reasons I have questions and they trouble me Do I still live inside your heart and inside your life as a passing thought? I write a letter to God and put it inside a poem. At night I pray for Israel too, because in war nobody wins. I pray for soldiers on both sides. That their blood will turn into flowers.

Do I still live inside your heart?

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